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Adolescence is a time of rapid change for a teen and his/her family. As children move into adolescence, they want more opportunities to make their own choices and to test the boundaries of rules and relationships. This can cause tensions between teens and their parents. A therapist can help teens and their parents work to get along better during this time of transition. Even when teens get along well with their parents, they may struggle with problems that they are reluctant to share. They may be concerned that their parents will not understand or will overreact, worry or be disappointed in them. Oftentimes, teens feel more comfortable opening up to a professional who is less personally involved and can help them make sense of what they are feeling and figure out how to successfully overcome their difficulties and challenges. Hakshiva’s in-house therapy clinic was founded to provide professional and affordable psychological counseling by observant, English and Hebrew speaking therapists who understand the unique needs of Ramat Beit Shemesh teens and their families. Our therapists treat a wide-range of issues such as low self-esteem, anxiety, depression, social difficulties, interpersonal conflicts, anger outbursts, and family conflicts. They work using a variety of modalities such as insight-oriented therapy, cognitive-behavioral therapy, art/play therapy, and family therapy. For pre-teens, the therapy relationship develops through playing games and other activities that allow the child to feel comfortable and share at a pace appropriate to their developmental level. Parents interested in referring their teen for therapy can call the clinic and be assured that all inquiries and information shared are held in strictest confidence.
We have over 12 therapists servicing over 140 youth and their families. This activity is overseen and professionally supervised by our clinical director and clinical supervisor.
As part of the teen’s individual therapy, parents will be asked to come for meetings with the therapist from time to time. The purpose of these meetings is both to share information about how the therapy is progressing and to discuss ways in which the parents can play an important and helpful role in assisting their teen with the issue at hand.
At times, however, individual therapy for a teen may not be feasible or even warranted. Parents may be looking for guidance in how to better parent their teens or specific techniques and strategies for managing challenging situations at home. They may need help in learning to work together as a team in their parenting. In these specific cases, the therapist will meet weekly with parents to offer guidance and to assist parents with skills and techniques to improve communications and increase positive interactions with both their children and each other.
Sometimes parents themselves may feel they need therapy and/or parenting guidance so that they can create a family structure conducive to a good relationship and healthy parenting.
Recognizing that a functionally healthy home starts with the parents, we have recently introduced couples therapy into our program.
Many couples today often have a fairy tale image of what marriage is and find that once the honeymoon period is over and especially after children begin to come, that their relationships become more stressed and the closeness that they once felt dwindles. Often it is precisely the things that seemed the most attractive initially that become the most annoying and intolerable as the years go on. We begin to discover things that trigger us, frustrate us, create tension, recurring arguments that can lead to resentment, disappointment and distance.
Many parents also do not have a toolbox of skills to create an effective intimate relationship because parents didn’t teach or model them. Did you promise yourself that you wouldn’t have the same kind of relationship as your parents, that you would be a different kind of parent to your children later to find that you are doing the same things, reacting in similar ways.
Couple’s therapy is a method of therapy with the intention to help couples improve and deepen their relationship. It is dynamic and includes both partners in the therapeutic process. Couples seek therapy for many reasons including feeling stuck in behavioral patterns that are dysfunctional for their relationship, negative views of the relationship or partner, emotional or intimacy avoidance, and communication challenges. Therapy encourages the couple to work collaboratively towards a healthier and happier marriage. In couples therapy, couples may address issues ranging from anger management, stress, anxiety, depression, communication issues, parenting conflicts, responsibility disagreements, relationship bonding and intimacy, life transitions, boundary issues with extended family, mental health, and financial issues.
Parenting guidance focuses on helping parents develop healthy relationships with their children and navigate the challenges of raising a family. This may involve addressing issues such as discipline, boundaries, communication, and coping with stress. The therapist may work with parents individually or as a couple to identify patterns of behavior that may be contributing to conflicts or causing stress, and help them develop strategies for improving communication and promoting healthy family dynamics.
At Hakshiva, our therapists will make sure to create a safe space for the couple to present themselves, their strengths and their difficulties as individuals and as a couple, and their desires for their married life. Together with the couple, the therapist will learn about the patterns of communication between them; learn about the start of the relationship and help the couple understand the emotional ‘baggage’ they brought with them to the marriage, and the implications that these might have on the marital relationship as well as their parenting. All of this serves to create a foundation for learning new, more effective and positive ways of addressing difficulties, for healing and renewal in the couple’s relations. With the support and guidance of our couples therapists, husbands and wives can increase positive feelings toward each other, and develop better communication, learn to listen and be heard, and take the steps to building a more loving and respectful relationship.
The therapists at Hakshiva are all qualified, skilled and experienced couples and family therapists who make use of a variety of treatment methods. The therapists all come from religious backgrounds and have a high level of knowledge and sensitivity to halachic issues as well as an understanding of the communities that our clients are a part of. They understand and are committed to protecting the confidentiality and privacy of our clients.
Relationships can be challenging, even when both partners are fully committed and have the best of intentions. If you and your partner are going through a phase with increased problems or struggles, or even if you just want to strengthen your relationship with one another, or build that all-important relationship with your children, you may benefit from couples counselling and / or parent.
It goes without saying that in order to create a home of harmony and solid education, we have a responsibility as parents to ensure we develop the necessary emotional tools and skills to improve our relationship as well as the relationship with our children.
Families may turn to the therapy clinic for advice on what treatment would best suit their teen. Our intake staff is happy to make referrals to outside mental health professionals and specialists in related fields if we are not the best address to help with a specific issue. Our number one goal is to make sure our clients have access to the best professional help available.
